If April Fool's Day became reality in Pakistan!

1. Anushka Sharma dumps Virat Kohli; takes Sarfraz for boyfriend! 

The NH10 star must have taken the decision on account of the recent hapless performances by Virat Kohli. Apparently, Anushka decided to latch onto another cricketer across the border whose stars are shining bright these day; Pakistani wicket-keeper batsman Sarfraz Ahmed! Whilst both Sarfraz and Anushka seem happy in each other’s company, Kohli seems to be heartbroken on being dumped by his ex-girlfriend. Oddly enough, Virat’s batting has peaked ever since Anushka parted ways with him and chose Sarfraz!

2. MQM Chief Altaf Hussain returns to Pakistan!

Amid thronging supporters, thousands of MQM flags surrounding his vehicle and slogans of Haq Ki Khuli Kitaab, Altaf Altaf, the self-exiled MQM chief waves from his heavily guarded vehicle. The motorcade is provided with foolproof security as it makes its way through Shahrah-e-Faisal; yes, the most feared Bhai has made his way back into Pakistan! Addressing MQM supporters, he vowed never to leave the country again and strive for his party’s cause within Pakistan!

3. Imran Khan joins PML-N

Cricketer-turned-politician Imran Khan finally joins Pakistan Muslim League (N). Flanked by Khawaja Saad Rafique and Chaudhry Nisar, Imran stated that it was his lifelong dream to be part of a genuine, democratic political party like PML-N. Wrapping up the press conference, Imran said that a corruption free, transparent and accountability-driven Pakistan was only possible under the leadership of Mian Nawaz Sharif.

4. Misbah Ul Haq becomes first Pakistani to score an ODI double hundred! 

The blistering pace attack of Mitchell Johnson and Mitchel Starc wasn’t even enough to stop the batting tirade of Misbah Ul Haq. The Pakistani batsman, ever since walking onto the pitch, started hammering bowlers left and right for fours and sixes. Misbah pulled and he swept till the ball was sent numerous times out of the park. From 174 balls, he smashed an unbeaten 203 which spawned 16 sixes and 20 fours.

Misbah stated that all ex cricketers who had mocked him for playing at a snail’s pace were nowhere to be seen. He further added that he had always been an aggressive player, viewer’s just hadn’t grasped it quite yet. He hoped his lightening fast innings would change audience’s perceptions about his batting style.

5. Nasir Jamshed named Pakistan’s test captain!

It was only the logical step PCB could have taken; Nasir Jamshed was appointed as Pakistan cricket team’s test captain after consultations with chief selector and PCB’s management. In the end, everyone was in favor of Jamshed, who has stood out always in the Pakistani team due to his consistent performance and skilled fielding. Always Pakistan’s trump card, Nasir is always seen taking catches in mid-air courtesy gigantic leaps. When it comes to batting, his skillful strokes have always aided in Pakistan getting off to a decent start and chasing down mammoth totals.

6. Mathira covers up with Hijab!

The actress showed off her reformed side to the world when she started wearing hijab and chose to revamp her bold image in the media. Mathira has covered up properly and promises no controversies as regards to her mode of dressing will ever cause injury to the sentiments of her countrymen.

7. Meera qualifies as Masters in English Language and Literature!

Paksitan’s renowned actress Meera completes her Masters in English Language and Literature program with an astounding Grade point average of 3.8! The actress has always been recognized in the media for her ability to fluently speak English and pronounce words which baffle literary personalities time and again. In a speech marking her latest achievement, Meera stated the following words without reading off a script:-

“I would like to thank the Almighty for this achievement. Through undeterred resolve, diligent pursuance of the language English and an attitude which refuted the concept of procrastination, I was able to pass this curriculum with an impressive grade.”

HAPPY APRIL FOOLS!