Taming the Tirade: Dealing with Verbal Abuse at Work

Being verbally abused at work is a horrible experience, and even worse when it comes from someone in a senior position. It can chip away at your confidence and make going to work a daily struggle. But you don’t have to just take it.

Here are some steps you can take to deal with verbal abuse from a senior colleague:

1. Recognize and Document:

The first step is to identify what constitutes verbal abuse. It’s not just yelling and swearing. It can be sarcasm, insults, belittling comments, or constantly interrupting you. Once you recognize it, start keeping a record. Note down the date, time, details of the incident, and witnesses (if any). This documentation will be crucial if you decide to take further action.

2. Stay Calm and De-Escalate:

Being verbally attacked can be infuriating, but reacting in anger gives the abuser power. Try to stay calm. Take a deep breath, and avoid getting drawn into an argument. If possible, excuse yourself from the situation and come back when you’ve composed yourself.

3. Set Boundaries:

You have the right to be treated with respect. In a private setting, politely but firmly let the senior know their behavior is unacceptable. You can say something like, “I don’t appreciate your tone of voice. Let’s discuss this issue calmly.”

4. Involve HR:

If the abuse continues, it’s time to involve Human Resources. Most companies have a zero-tolerance policy for bullying and harassment. Schedule a meeting with HR and explain the situation in detail, providing your documentation.

5. Seek Support:

Don’t be afraid to talk to someone you trust, a friend, family member, or a therapist. Talking about what you’re going through can help you process the situation and develop coping mechanisms.

Remember:

• You are not alone. Verbal abuse is a common workplace problem.
• It’s not your fault. The abuser’s behavior is a reflection of them, not you.
• You don’t have to suffer in silence. There are steps you can take to address the situation and protect yourself.

In extreme cases:

• If the abuse is severe or includes threats of violence, report it to your manager or HR immediately.
• You may also want to consider legal action.

Taking care of yourself:

• Verbal abuse can take a toll on your mental health. Make sure you prioritize self-care. Eat healthy, exercise regularly, and get enough sleep.
• Consider relaxation techniques like meditation or deep breathing to manage stress.

By following these steps, you can take back control of the situation and create a safer, more respectful work environment for yourself. Remember, you deserve to be treated with dignity and respect.